By Christa Sampson
Welcome to the Jungle is one woman’s memoir of losing and then finding herself in motherhood, but it really speaks to many mother’s stories in these times and how modern living forces us to recalculate, recalibrate, and eventually remove ourselves from how society thinks we should mother. Described as “A frantic journey through motherhood and self-discovery,” this books takes the reader through all the life events that shaped the author into the person and mother she is today, and all the things she realized that she needed to let go of in order to be the best version of herself and the best mother for her family. That said, there is no “best” way, there are several, because each family and each child is uniquely different and the life events that shape you on your journey are not the same for everyone. That is, essentially, the premise of this book: it’s more of a “here is my story—this is what went down and what’s worked (or not) for me” than an “if you do what I did, you will be successful too” kind of narrative, and that is very refreshing.
I personally identified with a lot of what Anneliese talks about in her book. I, too, found myself lost in motherhood and I didn’t really find my way back to myself until about a year ago (my kids are 13 and 11). Yes, motherhood can really put you through the ringer because just when you think you’ve figured it out, something else will come up and it will call into question everything you thought you knew.
I’ve followed Anneliese, or Annie as she’s often known, on her social channels for a few years, so I was thrilled to hear that she was putting all of her stories into a book. Many of her blog posts on pregnancy and motherhood have been shared widely and one in particular on maternal mental health and postpartum care went viral. She is a true advocate in the mental health space and through a transparent account of her own lived experience with anxiety and postpartum depression, she aims to break down the stigma that still exists and the barriers to proper care a lot of people face.
In this real, nothing-is-off-limits memoir, Lawton calls bullshit (yes, she swears in the book, so if you’re not a fan of four-letter words like one online reviewer I came across, this book is probably not for you), on everything from society’s expectations, the stuff no one tells you about before baby arrives, and also what to expect after. There are of course those popular instructional “what to expect” books that were made into a movie, but they are not a nuanced account of the realities like this book is. If you want the real dirt on what it means to mother, this is it. No glossing over, no bullshit.
Welcome to the Jungle is organized into chapters but reads like a collection of essays. All are related in some way, but each one has its own arc and overriding lesson or anecdote. Some of the stories date back to Lawton’s formative years. One could argue that as a child you’re not even close to the person you’ll be when you start a family; however, when you start a family, you’re nowhere near the person you’ll become after going through the hard times, the highs, the lows, the OMFG can-this-day-get-any-worse type stuff. Every experience shapes us. Looking back on where you came from is a prompt for “where do I go from here.”
Lawton’s writing style is very conversational and pulls the reader in. She’s relatable. She doesn’t make excuses or try to cater to anyone specifically. It’s very “this is me, take it or leave it,” and I appreciate that. The mom space, whether it’s online, out in public, or within the comfort of your own home, is hard. Full stop. Sometimes all you need to get through the hard is knowing that there are others out there who see things for what they are—the beautiful messiness of it all—and provide support by sharing their experience rather than imposing a “fix.” Through this book and her online content, Anneliese Lawton does exactly that, and I’m here for it. 10/10 recommend.
Thank you to Pandamonium Publishing for the complimentary copy of Welcome to the Jungle in exchange for an honest review!